Andy Moquin

Would You Change The Setting Of Your Engagement Ring?



Posted: Monday, December 21, 2009

by Andy Moquin
Rokstok.com

You and your man are getting married in a few months. You really like your engagement ring, but you hate the wedding band that would go with it. You want to take the diamond he gave you out of the setting and place it into a solitaire setting, keeping the diamond he gave you because you love it. Part of you feels terrible for thinking about changing it, and the other part doesn't. When he got his ring, you picked out the one he described he wanted and when you went there to buy it, he picked something completely different. So he got to choose but if you say you want to choose it makes you shallow? What do you think?

Deciding to change the setting of the engagement ring that your loved one has given you is a very tough decision!!! There's nothing that says you have to get the matching wedding band, you could keep the engagement ring that you have since you really like it and you could chose another wedding band to go with it. I'm sure if you look around you could find one that fits well with it and not have to change the engagement ring at all, that way you don't risk hurting your fiances' feelings and you're happy as well. My wife's engagement ring was not what she would have chosen for herself as she said to me, but I am so proud about picking it out for her and spending my hard earned money on it, that she could never have told me it wasn't what she wanted, so she made it what she wanted with the right wedding bands that she chose, I wasn't hurt and we were both happy in the end.

If you do decide to change the ring , you would be very gentle about it. I personally think I'd give a little white lie,(I know terrible right? But it would spare his feelings) and say something like you love the diamond but the setting rubs wrong on your finger and you want to know if it'd be okay with him if you got a more comfortable one, since you'll be wearing it the rest of your life!

Have a hallmark moment, sit there content leaning against his shoulder, put up your hand so he can see, admire your ring and then say, "How do you think it would look...? " and briefly suggest the setting you had in mind. Thats just if you don't want to hurt his feelings and really want it done, otherwise just leave it. Often its the simple things is life that are most beautiful. If you explain it to him, he shouldn't be hurt. After all, the diamond itself is perfect so its not like you are putting down the money spent or the quality or size of it. It is merely the setting you want to change.

As long as you're on the same page with your fiance and his feelings aren't hurt, go ahead. People change their settings all the time, mostly to upgrade and add stones after a number of years together. It doesn't make you shallow, it's not like you're asking for a bigger diamond, you just want a different setting. The diamond is worth tons more than the setting in the long run, the metal isn't the main point of the ring. That's why they say diamonds are forever, not white gold is forever! Or platinum or whatever! You should get the setting and wedding band you like best and don't feel bad at all.

Andy Moquin has spent 20 years in the jewelry industry with much of his experience in polished diamonds, rings , tacori and custom jewelry design. He is an accomplished business consultant and is available for advice on topics such as marketing, advertising, merchandising and business turnarounds.
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